Instructions for Use
You learned about it at a relatively young age. You probably found out you had it after an unpleasant incident.
When your parents (or aunt/uncle/sibling/etc.) told you about it, they may have been shouting angrily. Or, they might have been whispering, or using the tone of voice that you knew meant, "This is something we don't talk about".
You have seen countless news stories documenting it's use.
It has come to my attention, however, that it has been used inappropriately. It seems that someone has misplaced their owner's manual.
So, as a courtesy, I will use this forum to reiterate the do's and don'ts.
THE RACE CARD
Instructions for Use
*CAUTION* Excessive or inappropriate use of your card could result in it's revocation and/or invalidation.
BEFORE INITIAL USE:
Read Instructions for Use thoroughly.
Check with another card-holder to make sure that you haven't missed anything.
FOR DAILY USE:
There are very few reasons to put your card to use on a daily basis. They are listed below. When doing so, keep in mind that no one but you needs to know that you are using it (see statement of CAUTION, above).
- To remind yourself that you are beautiful (often used in slogan format ie. "Black is Beautiful").
- That was it.
FOR EMERGENCIES:
- Check with another card-holder to make sure that your incident qualifies as a card-worthy emergency.
- Get all of your ducks in a row (ie. paperwork, media-friendly statement, etc.).
- Contact a kick-ass lawyer.
Tear at the perforated edge below for a handy card you can carry in your wallet or purse!
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Do...when you don't want to go hiking/kayaking/bungee jumping/(insert dangerous activity here)
Don't...when you don't want to get a speeding ticket
Do...when you arrive at the open house & are told that it's no longer on the market
Don't...when you neglect to pay the house note & are told you have 30 days to vacate
Do...when a co-worker whispers racial slurs every time you come around
Don't...when a co-worker "forgets" to say Good Morning once or twice
Do...when you live in a Red state that wants to re-district "certain areas"
Don't...if you don't vote
Do...when the levee breaks, you're stranded on the roof & it takes 4 days for anyone to "realize" you're there.
Don't...when the sniper turns out to be black
posted by Piscean Princess at 1:37 PM
5 Comments:
wait a minute...you are black? I can't read this blog anymore...
LOL! you little racist!
you make me smile. I am so glad that you finally have your own blog! so much fun for others to now be able to experience your humor and insight that I get to hear 5 days a week (and sometimes more!)
Finally some instructions that are clear, simple and easy to follow...and are only needed in one language.
Can you make sure that this is distributed at the "monthly meeting"? I've got one to add...
Do...when you've been working at a company for multiple years (especially one that "values diversity")and apply internally for a position for which you're obviously the "best qualified candidate" and they decide to put the position on "hold"...
Don't...when you're a anti-social temp (AST)who's been left the birthday celebration list(probably because you're a AST)...who has come to the conclusion (being the Sherlock that you are...) that because of the exclusion you have racist co-workers who think that black people don't like cake.
i always find it very interesting get the point of view of african americans who are in cooperate america. speaking from experience is so different from speaking from ignorance..LOL.
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